The above expression leaves little room for the positive aspect of jealousy, even though it certainly exists. It also refers to the love you feel for something or someone. It provides valuable information, its important to face your jealousy instead of suppressing it.
Often, it reflects a desire you weren’t yet aware of.
Jealousy can also indicate how attached you are to something or someone, or the sense of ownership over another person. Fear of loss may come into play here. Nothing is certain—what we think we possess today could be gone tomorrow. Sometimes, something has to fall away from our lives to make space for something new.
Jealousy can also point to a lack of self-confidence, which often comes with insecurity. You can’t lay your insecurity on someone else, though this does happen. In (partner) relationships, insecure partners impose limitations on each other to cover up that insecurity. In doing so, they forget that true love is completely free. Insecurity can only be resolved within yourself, otherwise, it remains buried and will simmer beneath the surface. Such relationships can be extremely suffocating and hinder individual growth. Personal development stagnates as a result.
Self-love is the solution. Jealousy can also signal that you’re not fully recognizing your own qualities and talents. Self-reflection is important for this. So, jealousy has multiple facets, many of which we often overlook. When it remains at the level of envy, there’s nothing wrong. You wish the other person well, even if you’re jealous of what they have. Your unconscious desire is now conscious, and for that, you could even be grateful to the other person.
But jealousy can also turn into begrudging, and that’s when it becomes destructive—not only for your own happiness and creativity but also for your relationships, where it can have a very damaging effect.
Begrudging is not always recognized by the person feeling it; it often points to others in an ugly way and believes in its own negativity. It tries to cast the other person, or whatever it is begrudging of, in a bad light or tear them down. This feels good to the ego. It throws subtle jabs and makes spiteful remarks. In doing so, it unconsciously digs its own hole, placing the blame on the other person.
If you find yourself caught up in this, ask yourself what it is that you still deny yourself.
What steps can you take toward your goal or desire? Ask yourself what capacities you still deny in yourself. What you see in the other person also exists in you… That quality, that love, that beauty, or that success—whatever it is, you recognize it because that potential is also present in you; otherwise, you wouldn’t notice it.
Shift your focus away from the other person and back to yourself. Focus on your own dreams and goals. Whatever you give your attention to will grow. Do you often deal with begrudging from those around you? Realize that people who behave poorly toward others often feel poorly within themselves. When you feel happy and content, it doesn’t cross your mind to lash out at others, speak ill of them, or put them in a bad light. Subtle jabs are only given when something is bothering them.
Of course, it can be hurtful, but leave it with them, where it belongs. What it triggers in you is yours, and you should face that. When we point fingers, lean on, or grasp for something outside of ourselves, it’s a sign of disconnection from ourselves—we’ve lost touch with our core, with the love that already exists within us!
The emptiness must then be filled by something external, which only works temporarily.
This is how a consumer society can exist. You can’t find your need for love, or the lack thereof, outside of yourself. This will only offer a temporary solution, a kind of bandage covering the wound. We live under the illusion that success, happiness, and love exist outside of us, but this is truly the greatest misunderstanding of our time.
No one outside of you is responsible for your success or happiness—or the lack of it. And no one outside of you can replace the love you are at your core.
Self-love is the answer to everything you think you need to find outside of yourself. It resides within your inner world, in your heart. You just need to connect with it. Close your eyes and calmly breathe through your heart. Let your exhale last longer than your inhale, with a few seconds of rest before you inhale again. This will bring you back to your Self.
Often, our attention is focused on others, on things out in the world. This is typical of the ego, which points outward and compares itself to everything around it. It doesn’t look inward, where the solution lies.
For the ego, there’s always someone better, more beautiful, wealthier, etc. You are unique, and therefore incomparable. Struggle and competition are ego games. We feel threatened or competitive primarily due to emotional wounds that need healing. Your own color is beautiful just as it is! By comparing yourself to others, you actually lose your color. Our heart knows no polarization, no winners or losers—it is free and experiences unity in diversity. Struggle dissolves in our heart, in love.
Diversity makes life fascinating. It can and should exist alongside one another, keeping everything in balance. When we allow ourselves, our unique blueprint, to be more free, we also set others free. You are beautiful just the way you are. We are all equal and, at the same time, unique! Speak to yourself with positive and loving words; your entire system, including your cells, will respond to this.
Wish the best for others, and it will inevitably come back to you. This is a cosmic principle, a universal law, and it always works.
I wish you an authentic life, where you can discover all your hidden gifts and talents.
For more inspiration, visit: www.jelion.nl/information.
“You are perfectly okay”
“Active imagination”
“Unconditional peace”
“Judgement is about”
“Open heart”